So I got hit on by a gay guy. It might have something to do with the fact that I licked his nose.
And why did you do that?
Tequila
haha it staarrted out with just getting drunk then it turned into sports authority. So now im 4th or 5th in line and shit faced. Help me
If you ever bitch out on 72oz margarita night again, this friendship is over
It's like leaving me for his wife wasn't enough. He had to give me an STD too.
Whatever you didn't send me pics of you topless making bacon�
posting about faith hill is really not helping you get me into your bed
First you say "it can't get any worse" and the next thing you know you've shat yourself on Christmas Eve.
Btw. U, me, male strippers, beer. Gonna happen. We could totally get TNT from like u know TNT places
Just thinking about this summer makes me feel a slight tingle of an orgasm mixed with a twinge of regret as the cold ghostly feeling of multiple hangovers creep into my body.
I was so high I watched a 5 minute video of different scenes of horses running. The music was magical.
I don't know what she looks like but I'm pretty sure she has a pussy.
You were so drunk you told some dude your life story in one short sentence... and kissed his fiancé. You're invited to the wedding.
So far 2 of my professors caught me looking at their dicks
OMG. When you threw the used condom on your floor you threw it in my purse!!! I just went to grab my headphones and it was stuck to them!
It's starting to get sad how I have this 'new beginning' feeling after every negative pregnancy test
Randomize