my brother is about to go smoke a joint outside... he's preparing his munchies on the counter beforehand. I admire his responsibility.
should my penis look like a turkey
I guess you don't remember pouring tequila in the dog bowl and slurping it.
I was still in a towel. We hadn't even started drinking yet and the champagne bottle dropped and exploded literally up into my vagina.
Im covered in vodka and melted gummys. Fuck summer.
he gave me a thermos so I could take my coffee with my on drive of shame. I was unexpectedly grateful...
I just really need a hug and a shower beer
idk man, i just want to be a bad influence for future generations
They have a genuine stripper pole secured to the floor of their living room. I am thoroughly take advantage of it. I've made $5 so far. Why don't more places have poles??!
Nothing quite like walking through a spider web on your way back in from smoking to fuck up a perfectly good high.
Im pretty sure my housekeeper high fived her on the way out this morning
He's unconstrained by sanity, physics, or his liver.
Who brings nunchucks to a funeral?
this strobe light makes my body turn on and off
AMAZON SELLS SEX SWINGS!
Randomize
