Just mADE A PArabola og urine
Well, its 5:30am and you haven't let me in, I guess ill go home
I woke up and she had breakfast in bed for me
RUN RUN RUN RUN
Does it really count as two different guys if they're brothers? I like to think of it as one and a half.
I don't care. He smelled like a fucking chilli cookoff
I'm currently using two paint brushes as chopsticks to eat lasagna.... college.
My mouth holds just enough water for my bong
Im sorry that my initial plan of you grabbing his dick didnt work out but Im glad you grabbed his heart
Remember when I said "no boyfriend, no problems"? I lied. Tequila. Tequila is a problem.
We went to IKEA super baked wearing fake mustaches. You?
You know it's been a rough year when your therapist mouth is just wide open. And I didn't even get to the real issue!
You attract beautiful men with jobs. I attract ONE WITH A SOUL PATCH.
it was a sexy soul patch.
Thanks for being my best friend so I can use you as an alibi to my family while I'm out getting some dick in my face.
I consider walking to the bars and dancing my exercise and I buy doubles so my drinks r heavier so that's my arm workout
Watching a guy pay his tab with a check. Jesus dude...
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