let's have our labels/stereotypes/careers for each kid by next week.
oh how i love working at summer camp.
everyone knows that carl winslow was the sexiest man in die hard.
He was going nice and slow, then he yelled " BOONNEESTOORRMM!!!!!". I can't walk straight.
Didn't get the job. Searched for my references on FB and saw the pic of me weighing my head passed out.
If you're knocked up, we're telling everyone it's mine and that the power of our love overcame the inherent reproductive limitations of two vhagines.
He sent me a picture; erect penis, cat in hand and no pants on. He got a boob pic for that one.
You gave me your shirt to use as a napkin every time I spilled beer on myself. Before we went to the bar.
yeah we're mixing orange juice, vodka, and rum and calling it Oj Simpson On Trial
HIV testing and a light brunch. Sounds like a great way to spend Christmas Eve.
Maybe you'll have a Christmas miracle
He just pulled out my weave during sex....needless to say I'm embarrassed and in need of another shot pronto
I'm not sure... How do you tell someone who was so smashed they couldn't remember shoving their dick into the fireplace that their mother actually witnessed the whole thing?
I like how you were offering me $50 last night to come home with you to take care of you and your dog
I looked so sad that Jessica gave me a bar of soap. So that's where I'm at.
Your vagina needs to teach my vagina its ways.
Everyone in Columbus is two degrees of separation from my vagina.
Randomize
