1. Call me if you need ANYTHING. 2. If you get tag teamed, I want details.
it can't be normal that my body odor smells like fries
Five girls, one freshman pledge. We're like our own Make A Wish Foundation.
you yelled "who's job is it to keep me from breaking shit" and then immediately ripped off the molding as you fell down the stairs.
We're playing a drinking game to 'how to train your dragon'. has it really come to this?
you described his penis as a "portable fishing pole"
I'm just saying, no one has ever made me laugh or cum as hard as you do. Sometimes at the same time which I didn't know was possible. Is there even a word for that besides love?
I think he just caught a duck in mid flight
We were on the ground in Tampa for 55 hours and we drank for 30 of them.
We won Spring Training 2013.
Note to self: don't practice nerdy white girl dance choreography in the company bathrooms no matter how nice the huge mirrors and lighting are.
I haven't had to masterbate since I started dating him over a year ago. I don't even know if I remember how and my vagina is calling.
When my beach tent arrives , I strongly suggest quitting our jobs and becoming homeless beach drunks
ANIME MEN ARE MAKING ME QUESTION MY SEXUALITY AGAIN
NO. NONE OF THAT. SHAME ON YOU.
He stopped eating me out to remind me to look at the stars
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