Hey sorry for feelin' up your date. Sadly, this is a mass txt.
There is no way he is gay with that hair.
it was like she was tryin to eat my face and i was defending myself with my mouth
The voicemail says i shouldn't bother ever showing my face there again, i don't understand
We visited your boss last night. guess you wont be paying the rent this month, eh?
i officially have more pictures of his dick than pictures of us together
God I love babysitting. They pay me $10 an hour to watch movies and sext
i dont know what was worse.. snorting the wasabi or puking on the neighbors dog
Yeah, it kinda sucks. But it was fun while it lasted. And honestly, his penis is way too big for my life.
he ate me out like 4 times and told me that my vagina "was too much fun".
It was like giving head to a cactus.
For the record you were pretending you were in a rocket when you drove from wawa to your house. So like 2 minutes of me listening to you making rocket sounds over the phone lmfao
How do I send someone an apology text for giving them a lap dance in the middle of a party last night?
I crawled to the bathroom this morning there were cornpops scattered on the floor? What was I doing last night?
How ironic... opening your legs for closure.
If I get my period the weekend your parents are gone i'm removing my uterus.
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