i just woke up to seventeen texts from you saying all the things you would have done for a french fry.
good luck with ur interview. Just show them your confidence and don't make that sucking snot noise. Really don't. Praying for you, love mom
I would give up sex for lent, but I think Jesus would understand that I went too long without it to go back now.
We're exchanging pot brownie recipes in my substance abuse class. This is going to be an awesome 7 weeks.
I smelled my fingers after she left and they smelt like sugar cookies. I want that one again.
I've already come up with two plans that will probably end with me getting kicked out of here. You guys should come faster.
Had a farmer come into my class to talk to us today. He apparently met his wife on fb and just thanked jesus for his land. I think I am in the wrong major...
I just had to give myself a pep talk to stop lying on my floor. Literally too hung over to function
I don't not like him. It's just wierd talking to him because we both know I fucked his wife.
You guys can't keep having sex with them and cleaning their house! They're never going to take you seriously!
Probably not well advised, but you're welcome to stop by if your not ready to end your night. You know, for Thanksgiving's sake.
Yknow what, if there is a thug life for white bitches, I'm living it. I went out on a date, watched howls moving castle with my brother till he passed out, then went and got some a+ dick, and made it home in time to take my mom to work. Now its 7am, I'm in bed with some free tacos, and when I'm done eating I'm going to sleep. What a great night.
My sister just showed me a snap chat that I don't remember sending, it was a picture of me with two big macs in my bra with just the words "BURGER TITS"
I think I should write my liver a thank you note. If it had my work ethic, I would be dead now.
You don't make any sense
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