This girl is very crazy
She's one of those compassionate ppl
So everything I said on this seemingly endless date offended her
She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
In Vegas, have spent the last 48 hours wearing a viking helmet and fanny pack. I consider this to be a career high since drinking is my career
Hey man, sorry I chased you around the house with a small table.
btw im making up a story about these stitches..... i think a hockey stick to the face sounds better then i fell up the stairs
Delete her number from his phone. He keeps slurring how he's going to get her "all sorts of pregnant".
He told me to put on my big boy pants, then take them off and fuck her before he smacks me with a chair. His pep talks suck.
i still can't believe we survived that barcrawl. the third bar had bullet holes and we still went in.
they call him the transporter because he'll be your designated driver in exchange for sufficient weed or sex.\n
what about money
no - he has a code he lives by
wine pong. its mother daughter day and i think she's mad. I smell like jager
Whoever put the picture of my dad in the condom box is an asshole
I am making up for a 7 year dry spell so I get a pass and I don't always care if there is a second date. It is like college but with more money and condoms.
Lmfao. We asked what you wanted to eat and you said vagina. I don't care what kind. Fresh, barbecue, roasted on a camp fire. I just want it on my taste buds.
I'm potentially being cockblocked by Old Man Winter. What the fuck did I do to piss off an entire season?
I picked up a towel, and butt beads fell out of it.
Oh yeah... Surprise!
Randomize
