I'm chasing vodka with french fries.
Need sex. Gaining weight.
WE WERE REALLY IN A PORNO LAST NIGHT
I just did something awful... i just had to tell someone... i just used my brothers electric face cleaner as a vibrator
as nice as a boyfriend sounds, a relationship would require morals and self-restraint - both fields in which i lack.
momma always taught us never to change for a boy..
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
I made weed fried chicken. What have you done today?
sometimes when i'm drunk i choose the spanish option on the ATM to challenge myself.
if you really don't think our country's going to shit think of this. Exactly one year from now I will either be in law school or teaching young, impressionable kids, maybe even yours. Try to sleep after that.
Someone else needs to become the bad example in our group
But you wear shame so well
do you know how hard it is to walk a mile drunk on 151 it's hard yards are soft and every girl looks good
it wasnt even considered partying. it was like "ok, who can get the most shitfaced and not pass out"
He is dust bro dust in the wind I waited in this unlocked car long enough.
Baruch atah adonai DAT ASS DOE
I just smoked part of an Oreo cuz I thought it was some hash you left
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