i want to open my blinds to let the sunlight in my room, but i'm afraid my neighbors will be able to see me drinking and judge me
the best part about tonight...knowing when i wake up in the morning his car will still be full of packing peanuts..and mine wont
Dude, it's gettin so bad even my fantasies just wanna be friends.
Just got done reading an 11 page essay for class. Took me three fucking days and the only thing I have highlighted is the name "Alexander Cockburn"
He woke up, mumbled "silverware", and went back to sleep
you woke me up at 7 am banging on my wall.. what the hell
thats the international knock for joint time
There's going to be a pool, lightsabers and alcohol. What could go wrong?!
Stolen hampster on my tits. Don't tell me I don't know how to party.
Why did my little sister call me from your phone this morning?
Things like this can't be explained over text man
I can taunt you with whatever I want. Like batman and sex.
I rolled over and my thoughts became words and I said "oh fuck not you again" he didn't think that was too kind and asked me to leave
jut tell him gently that you'd rather spend more time with his dick than his face
fuck that its my house. if i want to take 1 bite out of the chicken & leave the rest i fucking will. suck my dick
I've replaced you with thin mints and masturbation
SOS YOU NEED TO TAKE THE CANDY PANTIES OUT OF THE GLOVE COMPARTMENT BEFORE MOM TAKES MY CAR
Randomize
