I wish everyone walked around campus with a video of what they did this weekend above their heads.
you were on ground yelling about how close the floor was to your face.
They have beer in plastic boots. How am I supposed to resist that?
At some point last night was I riding a garbage can.. Things are starting to come back to me
I'm just concerned it's gonna end up in my vagina again
I respect you for how well you shave your vagina. It isn't easy and my dick faces out, not in.
I'm being an old woman and getting trashed in a night gown in public...of course it's going to be fun
Apparently I used ziplock bags to smuggle my drink out with. By pouring it in one, then cut the corner like it was an icing bag later that night. What is wrong with me?
I'm thinking about slathering myself with peanut butter and going to the dog park. What's the worst that could happen?
I'm wearing too many socks to be ok with this.
Watching Rudolph while stoned is practically a religious experience.
Gave her a puke bucket just in case. She filled the bottom of it with tears. Super sad. Although I am super proud she didn't puke. That was a lot of Fireball.
I literally forgot every French word I knew and blurted out “mange moi” so he went down on me like I was some baguette fresh outta the oven!!!! I passed out.
If we were teenagers we would intentionally be trying to burn down this historic landmark
we bonded over knowing every word to freaky gurl by gucci mane so it’s kinda starting to make sense why I gave him head in his cul de sac
Randomize