I'm currently googling how to make a dress out of a trash bag. It's going to be a great night.
farters have to be the big spoon...
It was annoying to wait 4 hour for him to be inside for 5 seconds.
I'm glad my gym is open 24 hours..I stopped in on my way home to puke from the bar
No period for spring break; use this wisely.
I think we should make Neil Patrick Harris a permanent part of our role playing.
she's crying while babbling "all i do is win"
There is a guy, stoned out of his mind, only wearing slippers and a bathrobe in the library.
She just opened a six pack of corona with her car door ... I had no idea she was such a skilled drunk
A valiant attempt to obtain a backhoe was made
So then you challenged the bartender to an arm wrestling contest for a free bottle of vodka
Sweet. Did I win?
Youre hungover arent you?
What if he turns back to me, finds me seemingly fondling my breasts, and thinks I'm turned on by eagles?
Is there something wrong with us? Seriously.
Possibly, but I'd rather not fix it.
He drove over an hour to get this shit done. I guess i win the golden vagina award tonight
finals do horrible things to a person. i haven't worn pants since friday
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