p.s. this guy just tipped me with ecstasy pills. is this real life
You told me alcohol would be the death of you then ordered 10 shots of tequila.
four loko is apparently banned in the us. so i think its time for us to stock up. i already emailed them about buying them in bulk
This is going to be another afternoon spent getting drunk in the shower, isn't it?
i should do something illegal before my birthday. as of thursday im old enough to go to jail.
My hope for you over spring break is that you can be some disease free girl's random spring break mistake.
i don't even know why we got arrested this time. i think the cops just like our company at this point
When you can pee with one hand accurately while texting, you drink too much.
My code for I need help will be if I'm holding a bud light lime..
so i might have figured out why that girl isn't talking to me...I'm 90% confident I didn't give her a pillow when she stayed over >.>
Once you jizz in someones hat, you cant take it back.
My body looks like ricotta cheese had a vacation
we had to follow your trail of clothes to find you.......
He just got home after serving 5 years in prison. And I think I may courtesy fuck him. Best Christmas present ever.
it was awkward when he was taking off my clothes and i had to help him undo my fanny pack
Randomize