I dont think problem is the right word. Problems arent something you enjoy. Life would be too boring without gambling.
You probably havent been upstairs if you think that the microwave missing its door is bad
Beach body diet is off. Pizza hut worked its way back onto my google chrome top 8
The National Anthem was on so I had to have a beer
she was rubbing her elbow against the fish tank and laughing hysterically then she said I'M THEIR FISHY GOD and watched harry potter
last night he took my thong off with his teeth... god bless champagne
Just got attacked by a family of raccoons, I have the worst luck.
I'm pretty sure I swallowed a whole condom
I did get to watch you pee, tho. That counts as another precious moment.
a guy just walked through our campsite, crouched down by the truck, screamed "ACID ONLY LASTS FOR 8 HOURS RIGHT?!", then ran off into the bushes
We did it in the bar bathroom and the bathroom attendant sold us a condom. I love Nashville
You need to be on (or possibly create) the international emoji committee to address all of these glaring oversights
I woke up not knowing what state I was in. Turns out, people from Deleware are pretty helpful.
Woke up naked with a post-it that said "don't ask questions" on my ass...i know im not supposed to ask but uhm what did I do?
whoevers yellow car is in your driveway right now... i plan to steal. just an FYI
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