when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
Marg and I just meaowed the nat anthem. I was tenor.
'm tripping baaaaaaaaaaaaaaas
The girl in the car behind me just took a bowl hit. I miss college.
is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
You wouldn't know anything about the tooth on ice in my freezer would you?
That just sounds like a recipe for sex in my backyard. Yes.
All I remember is having a LONG talk with a 23 year old mother with a 5 year old kid at a bar who told me "it's not that bad"
It's 9am. I'm four lines ahead of you already. Wake up.
Saturday evening, however, will be my vodka and bubble wrap extravaganza.
Neil John just started open mouth kissing everyone to make sure they are safe.
He was respectful of both me and my One Direction calendar.
Wanna play whack-a-mole in my pants?
Your word choices worry me.
This was the fourth year in a row I got arrested at Pride. Pretty sure that qualifies me as a legend.
Hold on...did you Instagram a picture of you and your boyfriend while you were sending me dirty snapchats?
He said it was the classiest hand job he ever had because my nails were painted red. We need to go to nicer bars from now on.
Randomize
