Nothing says "I love you" like a full raw dog.
I need some transition time from spring break.. can we day drink between classes this week?
We're doing a case race on Saturday.
I'm in. I'm currently drinking a beer in the bathtub so I guess I can consider this "practice" and not just "alcoholism"
I may still return these pants. Depends how much they smell like alcohol by tmrw morning. I've already spilled once.
Ended up at a lesbian bar and almost got stabbed in the eye with a dart. Weirdest bachelor party ever.
I'm doing lines by myself in the kitchen. I think your outside. yeah that's you. your naked.
i can't understand anything he's saying. But he spells alcohol right everytime so i deciphered it.
I feel like if Miami and New Jersey fucked each other and produced a baby that would summarize the bar I'm in.
I woke up naked except for someone else's socks. Im so proud
You know, I think I'm going to rock the shit out of this whole mid-twenties thing. Fuck babies and weddings -- I have vodka and young cock.
Amazon.com "suggested" I buy both nipple clamps and opera gloves.
First thing that comes on in the morning is kanye's I can't hold my liquor. yeezus lives.
so I found out I could dislocate my shoulders on demand while I was trippin on e last night...
You humped everything and cried in an uber.
Fuck man, I am really high rn and all I've eaten is different forms of pie
Randomize
