yeah...it smells like an asshole would smell if someone ate sewage.
Sometimes I kiss girls just to make them shut up.
I just had sex in a moon bounce. It is all down hill from here.
Watching dad use Doritos to illustrate exactly where to locate the clitoris. How's your family christmas going?
You know, I had the money for a pregnancy test, but at the time, tacos were more important.
I HAVE stop dating guys for their prescriptions, you have no idea how awkward family dinner was. Thank god for his xanax.
best. trip. ever. this is going to be too much fun. petland isnt going to know what hit them.
He was hiding behind my bedroom door. at noon. Wearing a t shirt. And a condom. Not attractive.
Oh by the way, john gave me your shirt to return to you when I was at work today. I almost gave him his girlfriends underwear to return to her but figured it would be inappropriate.
I mean if you can't appreciate a good looking dick then just get out.
I recall trading my iPhone watch for a carton of Marlboros.
I just made a dick pic collage. Let me just tell you,there is no comparison to the latest!
I mean, she's batshit insane and once choked a guy with one hand but she's still MILF material in my book.
Do you think if I explain to her I want to have loud, unprotected sex with her sister she'll understand?
Stereotypically, lax bros last the longest, but have huge egos that are annoying. Baseball players barely last 10mins, but are really nice. And than we have soccer players, last long and have no egos. Me and my friends have collected our findings.
Randomize
