it always starts out as a suggestion then three hours later I have cum in my eye.
There was a lot of him and a little penis
Dude we need to petition the city about running buses later, none of my booty calls own cars
Going abroad, it was like my vagina was in a candy store... a sweet sweet british candy store
I asked my mom if I was the drunkest one in the room. With 8 days till I go back to school, I couldn't care less about being shitfaced at a baptism
im starting to recognize places in this city by where i have drunkenly peed in public
Take a good hard look at your life. And the number of 18-20 year olds that you have made out with in the last 6 months... and then keep doing whatever the fuck you want.
FACE TIME HER WHILE YOU GUYS BANG
DONT TALK SHIT ABOUT LUNCHABLES
During sex his mom asks from the other side of the door, "Do you like avocados?" Who doesn't like avocados?
You've been dating this guy for a month now and as your best friend I have to complain that I still don't how big his dick is.
Hooked up with a 20 year old. Only reason I did was cos I thought he was 18
40 year old guy made out with me last night while I had French fries in my mouth
If I died tonight, I'd be content knowing you were the last person to see my boobs.
My younger brother asked me "to stop fucking his girlfriends older sisters"
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