was it more than 30 minutes?
ya
then you're in a relationship
my roommate left her license, credit card, and cellphone on her desk. I feel like this is a trap.
the dr. explained that the first big patch is called a herald patch since it's biggest. So his name is Harold the Patch.
Wow. You named your rash.
i walked into the first stall,, but there was no paper, so i'm in the other one. a little kid is in the one without paper now and is making a lot of noise. curious how this'll turn out for him.
I cant wait for your democrat phase to be over.
I blacked out the second time 3am rolled around. My brain was taking a beating trying to do that math.
Just took 4 secret shots in his bathroom to not remember him naked.
She's trying to figure out what kind of dinosaur I am... Yay codeine.
There's a middle eastern man wearing a cow costume with tequila coming out of his udders, but I'm not sober enough to feel uncomfortable with it.
Her stepmother interrupted our sex to tell her it was midnight and she wanted to do a sympathy shot for her 50th.
Don't break up.
I think this girl gave me a handjob thinking that I would help her with her cell phone bill
omg. that's awesome
I'm eating captain crunch out of a cup half full of beer so idk
Like don't initiate a threesome when we're all watching SPONGEBOB. That's like sacrilege.
Once someone takes a shit in your toilet they are no longer a guest.
I’m calling dibs!
You can’t call dibs on dick. That’s free range dick. May the best vagina win!
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