Saw a Delta Zeta recruitment poster today. On it, somebody added, "All you need is your daddy's credit card and a lack of self-respect."
it's not our fault the pink and the sink are so close together.
Before I left he asked me if I could submit my panties for the frat house undergarment chandelier. I said yes
I think I pulled my groin stumbling back from the bar. That or the hippo I woke up next to.
We need to pull ourselves out of this slump. We need dick and lots of it. We are going to fuck our way to happiness.
She wants to have naked weekends
They call that free range vagina in France
Its only 9:11 and I just somersaulted through a window. Its gonna be a good night
So I'm thinking next semester you should be my own personal maid, nurse, masseuse and chef in exchange for free lodging, any food you can find, and unlimited access to my reproductive organs.
Every bathroom has like throw up and like bagels in it. Richie didn't even have bagels.
Whenever someone tells me they've never met a bisexual, I feel like a majestic fucking unicorn.
Strip club or gay bar tonight?
I am an emotionally compromised bisexual.
Excuse me while I gouge out my eyes.
In which case my work here is done.
I give out orgasms like candy and ride a motorcycle...how is that not appealing
She threw her burger out the car window last night. My vegan neighbors were not pleased but I’m pretty sure I saw a for sale sign go up on their lawn so I owe her one.
I’m tired of his bullshit and premature ejaculation. I’m going to hotel bars and finding a guy who is DTF
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