"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
When you want to head down the cleveland on Sunday?
What time do the bars open? I dont want to remember how bad theyre gonna lose
Can't wait to go see my drug dealers baby being born. He rolled all of the "it's a boy" cigars into blunts.
whatever happens this semester dont let me be that girl yacking in the urinal. again.
Just in case you were wondering..... I really did just wave goodbye to you with my penis.
I think I ate my cheesy fiesta potatoes cup.
I plan on drinking enough to kill at least 2 frat boys and make an aa meeting weep for joy
All i hear is "BITCH BETTER HAVE MY HONEY" and i turn around and there is a dude in a bear costume. It was fur real.
my make-up looks really good tonight. I swear it had nothing to do with me finishing all of your strawberry vodka.
I was grinding on him when mosquitoes starting biting us and ruined every damn thing. I just wanted to fuck on a slide under the stars. It's every girls dream.
It's okay I didn't send any nudes tonight so we are safe *inserts photo of a baseball umpire doing the safe signal*
I have a horrible feeling I left my dildo in the kitchen today after washing it. This is my life.
I'm just going to assume my unresponsive booty calls are just preparing for the women's march tomorrow
I think I'm just going to get a farm, a vibrater, and a lot of wine.
I did a line off of, and then danced on top of a table older than this country.
Harvard is great.
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