My sis friend said it was fake then described it as "scary"...greatest adj ever applied to my dick
ok what kind of idiot turns down casual afternoon sex?
Still at the library. i hate tax accounting so much that i've started calling it potions...
i find it sad that i can no longer sit in the back of class for fear that someone will fart into the heater again.
I had to use the resin knife to take the staples out of my tax return forms. Tax returns and a search warrant?
According to the bell hop, we stumbled in about 4 and then cannon balled into the pool.
This whole night would have been avoided if the liquor store had air heads
I got rejected. By another girl. At a red light. In front of seven shirtless cyclists in the middle of the night. How is that normal?!?
Putting a breathalyzer in a bar is a horrible idea. But I won
Two options. One, you listen while I freak out. Two, we have mediocre to awesome car sex and don't talk. Either way, I'll be there by 7
I am taking a candle lit bath, blasting some tupac and smoking a fat bowl. This is how every night should end. Did you go take a piss in his car yet?
I'm never going out with the ashleys again. it was whoreible. terrifyingly whoreible.
Heyyyy, naked guy in your kitchen, can i ask you a quick question about a legal situation in pb??
I thought I was at a rave until the paramedics started chasing me. You win again tequila.
Add tweezing eyebrows to the list of things not to do while on adderol....
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