Lets get really high and only speak Spanish to each other again tonight
Tonight we are playing Scuba-Keg. Getting keg now. I'll explain when i get home.
I just found her phone in the quesadilla maker...
Why do I love Florida? Because I just quit my job because it's too pretty a day to go to work and I'm going to the beach to eat seafood and drink beer.
Atlanta road trip update. Jimmy fell into the petting tank at the aquarium. And freaked out. With cops now... Keep you posted
He's hot though. It's not like he JUST got out of prison. That was like months ago
you peed off the balcony at your sisters and asked someone below to catch it with a cup
So, last night I fell asleep sitting Indian-style on the floor, propped up against the front of the couch with an empty wine bottle in between my legs... How was your night?
Just had an oven catch fire while I was balls deep. Fire department came, I did not.
Now in listening to Jerome Bettis speak at the hall of fame and my boner just started twirling a terrible towel
Also I've accepted I am not going to be a catch today. I look like a dead hooker and the remedial work is going to be patchy at best with the shakes I've got.
I hate him but I love him for what he does which is me
Did your grand seduction include learning to play careless whisper on a kazoo or was that just a hobby
I'm intrigued by how his mouth tasted the same as his dick.
he was almost the father of your baby, you should let him take you to dinner
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