Haha dude youd die if you were here. Girl presenting is defending the new testament and did her report on JESUS. best believe i'm gonna ask some hungover, atheist ass questions
hey can i ask you a kinda weird question?
i know what the question is. yes they are bigger, and no i did not get plastic surgery
Dood you jacked it to warcraft. you can't come back from something like that
Then he told me I had the most beautiful looking vulva
he said i took off my shirt and wrote "help HATI" on my tits, and charged people to motorboat me..... i'd like to say i woke up with 267$ in my purse
hey boys, thanks for all the pictures of your dick you took with my camera last night...they were really nice to stumble upon while reliving my night in the breakroom today at work
I just want you to know I tipped the cab driver $10 last night because I felt bad that he didn't have healthcare.
Got paid to make out with a girl. It takes skill to be this drunk and still make money
It was a karaoke bar combined with a liquor store and had a donkey pen in the back.
Keeping it classy as usual I see
I have fireworks and redbull; let's make heart attack inducing magic happen.
This morning I got out of bed 4 HOURS LATE, made eggs with a plastic beach shovel, and then ate them using pens like chopsticks in my bed with my turtle. Obviously, I am not in the mood to be proactive with my life today...
Broeke and glass. I feel so and. Appilogixe in morbing.
I don't even remember what he looks like. All I know is he's 6 foot 100. I like that.
There has been a song made about you fucking his roommate.
It's destiny.
So many people have told me I have great tits tonight, I'm unstoppable
Randomize
