Why the fuck do they always fuck on couches in porn?
Don't ever text me while you're jacking off. EVER.
if you could put a roof over IU campus it would be the biggest whorehouse in the nation
i signed up to donate 10 dollars a month to help the children that are being displaced in columbia because of the drug wars.. i felt obligated
I just saw a sign that said "STRIPPERS!!! As seen on Jerry Springer!". As if Springer is the highest honor. I'm pretty sure we're in south Georgia.
Is there a law against that?
Nope not at all. Just morals. But fuck it, this is college, not real life.
OK am i seriously the only one who thinks Cocaine Tuesdays is a bad idea?
This is how baked we were last night. Our drinking game: We stare at each other; first one to laugh drinks.
Did she owns a vibrator that will set off seismic activity.
My dad just asked if I could bring snacks to jail this weekend. Like what does he think this is, some type of adult play date?
You jumped into so many bushes for no reason
Her mom came down to the basement and took shots with us. She's now passed out in a wheel barrow. This party got weird
Well supposedly when the cops came, they say I tried to get them in a conga line like Jim Carrey in The Mask. So....yea
HIS DICK IS GLORIOUS AND I WANT TO RIDE IT TO VALHALLA
On another note, I think my upstair neighbor is having sex. How awkward would it be if I showed up to her door with a bag of Chipotle?
This is the weekend we were supposed to be in Vegas making bad decisions hoping no one got VD, not stuck at home for the 900th day in a row
Randomize
