My astrological sign? Vagitarius.
Lots of explosions. Minor nudity. Full penetration and lots of tuxedos.
There comes a time in a man's life when he's almost thirty he just needs to stop watching Degrassi. This is that time.
she was laying naked in the stream looking for "ribbays", which is apparently drunk for frogs.
I locked the porch door but I left a spare key on top of the keg on the side of the house
Bought two parrots for us. I'm keeping them at the Bellagio.
He had a shameless baby voice when he was talking to my dog. There's no way I'm making it through the night with my clothes on.
So the stripper who poured a beer on my head also gives great head. Even she doesn't know why she went home with me. No more mystery shot challenges.
They got me high and left me at the mall with a giftcard for $400. I need an adult.
being sober in physics class makes me realize the regularity with which i show up to it still drunk
And after we debated politics. My dream come true: naked, just got done having great sex with a hot mixed guy, talking about why social welfare programs are a bad idea
GETTING HORNY AT RANDOM IS REALLY FUCKING INCONSIDERATE.
We do have a rich storied history of emotional warfare
Honey you are a beautiful woman but I came over to eat your pizza and fuck your brother. And you're out of pizza.
and i thought it was paint or jizz but it was cheese
please tell me you didnt taste test that
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