i'm trying to reconcile what i did last night with who i am as a person.
My insides feel lik shag carpet. It is awesome
You were hopping up and down because you wanted only his strongest sperms to make it to the egg.
Darwin at his finest.
I'm quitting my job and I'm just going to become a professional drunk girls mistake.
Said he had been eating pineapple for a week before our 1st date. Not sure if thankful for his consideration or offended by his assumption.
And on top of all this... he just told me to "chill my nips."
Dude give me 4 good reasons we shouldn't trade girlfriends tonight
We don't need a hotel, we'll just sleep in the post office.
But today feels so special with katie getting herpes and me cleaning my room. Good things are happening.
I wish they could condense everything I needed, nutritionally speaking, into mike and ikes
Someone posted a printout of my tits on my door this morning! Where did they get this photo!?!
I am naked in a blanket sprawled on my bed eating a pastry. This is all I want out of life. Ever.
I masturbated to my balding thirty-something co-worker last night. I am a new level of lonely.
Nothing wrong with a few meaningless hookups. Keeps the mind occupied and the body satisfied
Well. Now I feel like I put pants on for nothing.
Randomize
