Getting up at 8 this morning to drink could be the best and the worst idea we've ever had
I'm at the bass pro shop. They have a river full of trout and turtles, a shooting range, a full bar, and the patriots cheerleaders are here. I now understand why people are rednecks. I may never leave
He's trying to kill me, one liver cell at a time. It's going to be a slow, but awesome death
he walked down the highway for 3 miles at 4 am, and got me coffee on the way. i dont think a blow job would have been enough.
Wackin it to the USA womens soccer team. My own personal way of saying job well done.
It was a deal breaker when she told me not to wear a condom and god would decide if we were meant to be together.
Kid sitting next to me smells like he slept in a dutch oven full of farts. Going to die.
Ya these assholes wanted to like sit around and eat cupcakes and watch the notebook. I was like fuck you, I want to go make some people uncomfortable in public.
Nvm, he just almost drank his drink from last night, his drink that has the condom in it. Kinda answers my question.
All I've been thinking about for the past 12 hours is sex and SEAWORLD
i need to put some appletini on your dick
Would you still love me and fuck me doggie style if I had a dinosaur tramp stamp?
As much as my throat was opened up this weekend, you'd think I wouldn't nearly choke on a damn almond.
That moment when you're in a room with 3 guys and know how big their dicks are. Then you are married to the one with the smallest dick.
What's the blow job-backrub exchange rate these days? I've got some killer stress knots
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