No shame. Just smoked a bowl with a Norwegian. Feels like something to cross off a list.
Yes my plan is to drink the college out of me so i can be an adult by monday
He changed his profile picture to him as a baby. Definitely a turn off. This will help in my "don't-be-a-slut-endeavors"
if you do the accent, i'll wear the eyepatch
When you wake up so hungover that you don't even wanna cough for fear of vomiting... It's not gunna be a good day.
He just showed up with a bottle of wild turkey a half a can of coke and some marshmallows yelling "gobble gobble bitches" my roommates hate my cousin
I spent the day drinking wine and meditating. I'm zen as fuck.
Its mothers day, andI woke up with 12 bar stamps on my face, holding orange juice and a box of tampons. This can not be happening
If there was a bread and water delivery truck id make sweet hungover love with it.
unless you have a dick and you were thinking of chopping that off
She's passed out laying in the middle of the street. Cars are honking at her and going around her body. We need to stop playing BONECRUSHER.
Dude. I'm no longer allowed to use my sword when drinking. I just spent 20 min cleaning up popcorn. I stabbed Moe in the leg and chopped his door knob off
i just used a selfie stick to take an ass pic. i hate myself.
Just dropped the most perfectly rolled joint into the toilet I just finished taking a shit in, hadn't even had time to flush, 5 second rule?
No!
His mom showed up at my doorstep, begging me to take him back for him
Where do you find these people?
Randomize
