hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
Reason #437 to hate Louisiana: Just went to the public bathroom at work. It was so humid the toilet seat was damp and sticky. Either it's the humidity or I sat in somebody's yesterday piss. I choose to believe the humidity.
I'm lit.While shaving my legs I pretended the razor was a tractor cutting down corn. Noises included.
Joey just asked me if I ever got anything stuck in my vag.
was it embarrassing when you had to say yes?
We've been fucking since Friday.... This is the most committed non-committed relationship I've ever been in
i've never smoked before...when you said wake and bake i thought you meant like a funeral bbq or something
and when he finished he handed me a baby wipe so i could clean up. i'm ok with the fact that he has kids, but not sure how to react to this.
Your boobs are like a big quesadilla marker
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
Are you coming to the bday night? i'll be doing a life-like reenactment of traveling through Bonnie's vaginal canal and taking my first breath of life. Don't think you'll want to miss it.
I can bring a slip n slide and curtains.
I will turn myself into a beacon of get at me bro
You got stoned and bought $300 worth of pudding. Again! Why do YOU think she left you?
Like tbh you're not doing anything that screams I'm drunk and yet nothing says I'm going to spend $30 on McDonalds and make out with a stranger like that picture
I'm so happy for you. But I still have to shave because a woman has needs and this woman needs an orgasm.
he's such a nice guy...he deserves a bigger dick.
Randomize
