she had a my little ponys comforter. i left when she went to the bathroom
and I didnt even know his name until this morning when we were laying in bed and he referred to himself in the 3rd person.
I love my penis, it thinks for me sometimes
mowing the lawn. still drunk. If my dad doesn't appreciate this I swear I'm dissowning everyone including him
As long as you're not dating white guys again.
Apparently one comment in my womens studies class cockblocks yourself for an entire semester.
Showed up 2 hours late and still drunk nobody gave me a high five. This intership is bullshit.
God he's so convenient, drugs, an parties all in one person. He's like the Walmart of delinquency.
don't give me stepladders when i'm stoned.. i woke up to a slice of balogna nailed to the ceiling
Because cocaine and lesbian hookups on a Tuesday cannot be the new normal
We are the rockettes of vaginal bleeding
I don't really care where everyone ended up, but is everyone alive and not in jail?
Not in jail
Alive?
I don't think I can get drunk, high or horny enough to even consider that
Woke up. Found about 20 condoms upstairs. A hole in the couch. Bread on the floor. Going back to sleep.
I miss your drunken presence, and strong odor of hard liquor and potent weed.
Randomize
