You drink too much
No, I drink just the right amount - too often.
my goal in life is to wake up with my underwear on
Wait, how is it that I'm just getting ready to go out and you're already showing your penis to freshmen girls?
It's an open bar on a yacht... I'm going to drown.
i'm sober ask me anything about the civil war
Yes perhaps we are both wrong. And did you call me bj girl?
I saw a 60 yr old mans penis last night. Just for the record.
Walt said he was feeding me so I wouldn't die. that's why there was pasta in my room
Nvm, he just almost drank his drink from last night, his drink that has the condom in it. Kinda answers my question.
It's like he drunk calls 6 times for me to come over, but can't say hello at lunch.
In case you're wondering what frozen hashbrowns taste like at 4 in the afternoon, shame. They taste like shame.
It's rum buckets o'clock
With gravity the way it is and your butt clearly being the size of a bus you'd break your hip or something
I think I hear the ice cream truck
I could be going crazy though
NO IT IS THE ICE CREAM TRUCK IT'S ALMOST AT YOUR STOP
so horny i almost want to text him..and then i remember the restraining order i have against him
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