i've got a dick and you've got a pussy....what is the problem??
There are just some things I refuse to put in my mouth.
They keep asking what you are doing. I told them to quit calling her "what."
so its thursday, which means its time to resume communication with you
Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
Sundays have taken on a whole new meaning when I'm not in bed with an excruciating hangover.
I mean besides the fact someone got stabbed, I still had a pretty good night.
I've thrown up in front of nearly every customer we've had today.
His water bottle is sitting on my coffee table like a monolith dedicated to the things he is not doing to my vagina.
Waking up in a NH rest stop and reading through my texts is definitely a familiar low
Gotta wait until my full time offer is confirmed before I try to fuck the mid level manager
Adulthood is weird i just cleared a check larger than my gross income from 2011 but i also just did coke during my lunch break
I guess the lesson here is that I shouldn't send nudes to elected officials.
I can't go to the bars anymore. She wanted to see me again and I drunkenly told her I was moving today. If she spots me I'm fucked.
The work outs are working. Someone just said my body type was “Tits On A Stick”.
Randomize
