Just found out you can rent the rollerena for 100 bucks and you can bring your own beer... when are you free this week?
this is never going to happen for me, I think he thinks I'm crazy
well you did scream "PLEASE! I'LL S YOUR D IN FRONT OF EVERYONE"
You broke out your mechano set and told us you were gonna "build us a beer machine" and 5 min later you were fast asleep
so i guess now we know you can get away with peeing mere feet from the Capitol if you shout IM PREGNANT at the guards
Kinda sad when you get home on a Sunday morning and the paper guy HAND DELIVERS the newspaper to you...,
Day 1 of "Death of a Liver" weekend complete. It came with flashbacks of horrible mistakes I made due to alcohol. I'm excited for how Sunday is going to turn out.
N.C. cops just used a megaphone to tell me I have a slutty outfit. My life is complete.
Id fuck him but only at his house and he had to stay im bed till i left. He only works upper body. It just creeps me out how tiny his legs are
Apparently she has a 10 week old kid, which would explain the hallway effect I was feeling.
I had to break it to her that she was not in fact behind the bushes when she peed on the church last night
HE STARTED HUMMING THE THEME TO STAR WARS!! WHILE I'M SUCKING HIS DICK!!
Someone the age of your son tried to go home with me from the bar last night
I'm dedicating this beer to drunk texting
Remember Christopher who always sends me pictures of his penis? Look to your right, boy in the blue.
I just used my dick as to measure where my desk would go because I don't have a tape measure or a ruler.
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