Emee failed...She used my genitals as a tampon
you need to do more things constructive for your career. like wearing pants more often.
how are pickles made is in the google history again... why do you always wonder that, and forget the answer?
he said I could live with him because I'm cheaper than a dog and don't need a pet deposit. That and I don't piss on the carpet...
Just got Netflix. Dexter Marathon. Still in my PJ's. Only eaten cookie dough and drinking a 40. I have never reeked so strongly of lonely .
He managed to tell me he was blind in one eye and convince me to have sex with him in the same conversation. It's love.
come back what if one of your parents walks in and im just sitting here eating a cheesesteak without you
You me handle of captain and a sorostitute study sesh, if we don't get laid mancards must be relinquished
we had break-up sex in a port-a-potty. how do you think it went?!
I have random bruises including my spine and visible bite marks on my neck. Thanksgiving car sex accomplished.
Let's buy some Wrangler jeans and be real live men.
I'm ready to get married, then we can lie around watching anime and eating pizza while he rubs baby oil on me
I remember grabbing your ass. So firm. So right. I don't regret it.
ANIME MEN ARE MAKING ME QUESTION MY SEXUALITY AGAIN
Not gonna make it. His stripper neighbors are playing a Super Bowl drinking game that involves removing my clothes
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