lets put it this way..we'd win on tool academy
he told me that if i wanted to smoke he could make a piece out of my shoe. were keeking this kid around
My 10 year old son gave me a bottle of jameson for fathers day. Did you have something to do with this?
We asked an illegal alien to buy us beer. He didn't even want a tip. I'm going to Washington to plead that case.
As per my father's affair, married men are no longer off limits.
Company party. Just told vp "you look like a cat person"
Between the booze, mechanical bulls, and penis's I think my body hates it when I'm single
I can feel my liver begging me to stop.
this is terrible I feel like i'm trapped in a cage with a wild republican
EW HE JUST SNAPPED ME A NUDE BUT HE CENSORED HIS DICK BY COLORING IT I DID NOT ASK FOR THIS
Pizza and koolaid didn't even make me feel better. This hangover means business
My boobs looked so good under the black light I saw a girl physically cover her boyfriend's eyes.
Last night you texted me "tqiirkykbg doe freedom always"... why?
Doesn't matter if you work at a funeral home. If the boss says get a keg, you get a keg.
He took off all my clothes, fingered me, than said "would you be more comfortable if I was naked too?"
Randomize
