Seeing Harry Potter 3D stoned: Pro- giant redheads w/cute accents. Con-weeping for stoners who only had Pink Floyd laser shows.
it wouldnt have been so bad but she still had the cowboy hat on when my mom walked in
you dialed the number "23" then talked to it for three minutes
This threesome is so guaranteed that dinner feels like a charade
I wish I could sell my textbooks directly to my drug dealer and cut out the middle man
if the best thing you can say about him is "he probably wont kill me" you may want to rethink hanging out with him
you goin out tonight?
who is this.
your orgasm for tonight
I kindof just wanted to go downstairs and let his dad know how good his son was at sex
If you hook up with a kid and the next day he breaks up with his girlfriend, those can be seen as two completely unrelated incidents right?!
You then showed up downstairs in only a robe, telling everyone how you were "the most chivalristic fratstar ever."
My liver and my bank account can't afford another all nighter. Help.
So both cops helped talk her into coming back into the bar and doing a shot with me. The main argument being, "a bar is no place to be sober!"
I let a blind guy feel me up. All he kept saying was "oh fuck yeah!"
I keep shaking cocoa puffs out of my hair. Best Sunday Funday ever.
a large sweaty girl i dont know is sleeping in my bed. A scotish man and a small child looking dude are on the couches im on the floor sleeping and im ok with it
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