that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
I've been here 20 minutes and some creepy old man told me he wanted to know what my insides felt like. I hate gay bars.
Leave it to him to get us kicked out of a bar for hitting on an 80 year old woman. I want to be that wasted one day.
I think you blew it when you asked her "Do you look good naked too, Or is it just the bra?"
Nope, just sitting on the couch, eating an advent calendar, being depressed about the herps.
There was a reason that "Throat Warrior 2011" was written on my martini glass. He said my title was undisputed.
that's why you don't digest questionable powders from girls wearing tutus at a dirty club
Let's go get our ovaries removed together. It'll be like bonding by getting mani/pedis, but with more vicodin and less unwanted pregnancies.
When he came downstairs he looked at me like I was attempting to rob his house.
Did you reintroduce yourself?
He threatened to call the cops.
She just kept saying "bless your heart" to him while he cried because he came so fast. I think a Texas woman was just what he needed
He put crushed up bacon in the joint and now we're listening to the Matilda soundtrack I have no idea what's going on
You know what's even more awkward then buying plan b from someone who is a member at the gym you work at... When they come in after that day and have that look of recognition
Tequilla is a sneaky bitch ninja that doesn't kick in until you least expect it. Then BAM! You're peeing in unconventional places.
last night I mixed vodka in with my protein shake... and you tell me my new years resolution was impossible
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