I googled Canada's legal age of consent. I have good news. It's 14. Justin Bieber here I come...
4 maple syrup blunts. Decided to sit on my roof and count the snowflakes that landed on my tongue. 84.
NBC reported that a group almost has enough signatures to submit pole dancing as an Olympic sport in 2016...
God I fucking love America.
He gave me an orgasm with his left hand...and he's right handed. Of course he's a keeper.
its a sex-hate relationship...no love involved
I told him I'd put in a good word. And the word of the day is: NEGATIVE
In all seriousness...vodka, almond milk and chocolate syrup make a decent white russian.
Ya these assholes wanted to like sit around and eat cupcakes and watch the notebook. I was like fuck you, I want to go make some people uncomfortable in public.
And apparently i asked another younger guy at the bar if he wanted his bud light pumped straight into his vag. As i put back an irish car bomb...
Nothing is creepier than a guy telling you "I was just thinking about you" in a men's bathroom when taking a shit
Okay, I just got to our real hotel and the YMCA may have been a better choice. A man w/ no shirt on
I'm convinced he's the patron saint of oral sex
You was so high that you insisted that you heard someone whistle, then you insisted they was trapped in the wall!
Despite breaking my phone, thumb, and my dignity, last night was pretty good.
We're starting to light shit on fire, bring a metal bucket. Be prepared, Jimmy's off his meds.
Randomize
