i have i love cock written on my hand and a vagina drawn on my arm and i just finished eating breakfast with the whole fam for mothers day
ahah at least you got away with it
nope...my gran was the one who informed me
YOU GOT EVICTED FROM A TRAILER PARK!?!? WTF!!!!!
can't come out tonight. went to the bar again last night and the bartender hugged and thanked me so much for my "generosity." I'm intrigued but terrified to see my credit card bill.
Your noise violation report contains the word "five-some"...wtf happened in here?
my dad is going to jail this weekend
where are we going to get our weed from?
I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
I know I said that I'd stop dating 20 year olds... but at least this one's not my student...
Well as our DD it was my responsibility to get us home safely. If that meant strapping you down to the backseat using all 3 seatbelts then so be it.
Yeah? Well I'm currently predrinking downstairs in my room by myself. Absolut and water with a hint of mint because I'm using the glass I keep my toothbrush in. Fuck, you bitches better get off work soon.
It's amazing to think about how many Obama victory sex babies are being prevented by Obamacare free contraception.
Watching the wiggles while tripping on acid is the scariest fucking thing of all time
Perfect. Let's do that. I'm thinking everclear and green dye as our base. We shud start from there
She brought over her portable harddrive and we dueled with porn. This relationship is too beautiful to last.
I'll pay you back with progressively deviant sexual favors.
I might be getting fired on this week so the only option i see for tonight is to get smashed and have an orgy. actually this idea might explain why i'm not an ideal employee.
Randomize
