I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
we went to that german restaurant and drank out of the boots. Then I threw up into one
this coming from the guy that still thinks "pulling out" is a good form of birth control? just walk away
There's just this way he looks at me that makes me want to suck his soul out through his dick.
I jsut got pulled over and passed the sobritaty test.
Good thing spelling doesn't count.
They found an open window, climbed through and proceeded to arrest half the party. These campus cops are like fucking ninjas.
She said I walked up to the McDonalds counter and ordered just a cup full of pickles then proceeded to offer some to everyone in the place.
You were on the drunk bus swinging around on the pole when you decided you were hungry, so you pulled half a bagel out of your pants and ate it. Everyone stared at you, dumbfounded as to where it came from, and cheered
So would it be tacky to offer my services as a future attorney as an engagement gift for her?
Repeat. Dildo on the ceiling, confiscated potato shooter, and bottle of yegger. Repeat. Ceiling dildo and yegger.
Carving a pumpkin in a gay bar at 2am. How did my life get to be this way.
You called me at 3 am laughing like an idiot. Apparently you consider breaking out of the hospital to be a lifetime achievement.
Seriously, he's as bad as Joffrey. I hope this ends like Game Of Thrones did.
I gave her a cheerful high five and she turned to me and said, "we should do that with our genitals." I may have to marry this girl.
oh, he’s out of jail btw. as of about 6pm. one of his customers bonded him out apparently lol
Like he really got a coke fiend to bond him out?
Randomize
