is your mom at the bar?
GM filed for bankruptcy, all the dealerships closed, and it's june and I'm in jeans and a sweatshirt and I'm cold. What is the point of living in this state anymore?
my house keeper must think I'm a prostitute.
why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
There's a vagina buried somewhere in there.
It's official. Every guy I've slept with has been to jail.
sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
All i remember before i blacked out is you pointing to a random chick and telling me to bang her for America.
It just feels wrong masturbating with my neighbor's cat in my apartment
Vaginas creep me out. I'm disgusted by the look of them. I wonder if this is what having an ugly baby is like: you have to take care of it and love it but it just hurts you on the inside to look at it.
Thats gotta be it. Also just found out that the fireworks will fit in the airsoft pistols...we are all gonna die
I've officially done it all, fucked a girl wearing a twister board. ABC parties are amazing!
My body is like , remember when you wouldn't let me puke last night? Good luck at work fucker.
Apparently I tried my hand at mustard juggling. I wasn't very good.
He's practically not my boyfriend anymore. So let's go get some glitter, balloons, alcohol and forget this night ever happened.
Randomize
