my girlfriends now gay ex-boyfriend kissed me. tell maddie i can't hangout today
please say your awake. the girl i brought home last night...any idea on a name? she isnt up yet...
We removed her tutu and her cape, so there's no risk of her strangling herself.
I found the perfect eye liner, it passed the blow job test, no smudging!!
The fact that both my ribs are severely bruised from shoving flasks in my bra might be a validation of my mothers alcoholic accusation
not my fault hes the one that tried to cuddle after. said he wanted to spoon away the shame.
We have six bottles of wine and we are at target buying baby oil to grease up the sleds with, just in case you're interested.
it's pretty awkward texting you how much I want to suck your cock when I have my mom on speakerphone.
On my way
As he was cumming he yelled "Yahtzee" then said im free to go. Thats my one night stand
Knew i was going to puke. So i grabed a bowl out of the kitcken in the dark before bed...Ended up puking into a spaghetti strainer...
I think I’ve been affected by his dad mustache. I wanna ride it.
may or may not have entered into a gay civil rights discussion with 6 year olds. Hint: I did.
Good morning! Spongebob is on channel 257 when you wake up. Help yourself to breakfast. You were great last night. See you when I get back.
You threw him in the dryer?
He went in of his own accord. Mumbled something about experiencing the blossoming of popcorn.
only 3 drinks in and he showed me his fursuit, please come pick me up
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