I am not hooking up with him just to see what his penis looks like.
we just ha sex. he lasted two minutes. i told him to leave because i had class
isnt today saturday?
We hadn't had sex in so long that I started queefing and then I couldn't stop giggling... I think he's mad.
He introduced me to his parents as the girl he made out with on Thursday night...
he was holding his dick in one hand and my boob in the other and i looked down and thought, this is my life
Let's just say, at one point i got woken up at 4am by a naked guy who was offering me steak, in a cup.
Please tell me there isn't another video of me on the toilet...
He spelled Steven with "ph", needless to say my nose was almost bleeding from the amount of axe he was wearing.
I better not get a vid of you penile helicoptering
Got another job?
If by job you mean clever way of getting free tattoos, then yes. I got another job.
This is not 2004 anymore. It's not acceptable to get fingered while watching 'Ferngully' in a basement full of your friends.
Look, you don't know disfunction until you've sat on the john taking a shit and crying while totally sober.
He was awesome with her today. I can't say that it didn't make my Fallopian tubes sing "The Hills Are Alive."
Hey, you should go to your facebook ASAP... i'm guessing you're wasted but you just uploaded a picture of someones dick...and everyones taking bets now if its Rick or Mikes..
that guy was staring at your tits.
nah, more like they were staring at him, and his girlfriend, and her less than adequate bosom. they pitied the fool.
point taken, oh mistress of the bosoms.
Randomize
