i'm so hungover...i might vomit in a handbag instead of selling them
So when does "going out for one drink" = giving some guy an HJ on the sidewalk?!?
Covered in glitter and dick. 2010 feels a lot like 2009.
Just fucked my roommate on the first night of our 12 month lease. 2010 will be awkward.
There are paw prints all over my ceiling.
Does the blue bra belong to your sister or cousin?
and i'm going to kill you for what you did to my nipples last night. of course i want to hang out
They had their heads out of the car singing the wrong words to the national anthem as we drove through traffic of people leaving the fireworks. AMURICA
He's def the type to chop us into bits whilst screaming "NAPA BITCH". AKA my type
Just took plan b with my eggs and chai...homecoming got the best of me already
He had a drawn-on fu manchu and now my vagina has one too.
Question. There's no better feeling than clean shaven balls. Do girls get that too?
He stopped mid sex to pour wine in my mouth...
Marry him.
It was great. He never spoke.
That's not why it was great, just that's all I remember.
so i put my jacket on last night that you wore last weekend, and reach inside the pockets and find them full of goldfish...
the snack that smiles back:)
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