Do ugly people know they are ugly?
The quiet ones do.
I finally had kitchen counter sex! i was so excited
i had a dream that i had so much marijuana that i didn't know what to do with it. i woke up and cried.
I dreamt I won the Huge Cock Championship last night. It was glorious.
Yep and i guess after he came back from that he sat down next to me and i just put my hand right on his penis just casually like it was his leg
i was mezmorized. she was the most beautiful girl that looked like a boy i ever seen
Aaaaand then she sang MDMA to the tune of the YMCA song, with appropriate gestures.
Fucking someone because they own a lava lamp is like fucking someone because they have 20 dollars and no concern for their house burning down.
It must suffice lest there secretly exist a picture of me walking out of the ocean at midnight naked and half mast with a sea urchin on my ass
Like we just had a bunch of sex and then he threaded my eyebrows in bed lol. It was amazing
Watching the Walking Dead, snuggled up naked, and drinking a beer. No better way.
If ever there was a tweet to describe your life, it's this.
Smoked a blunt with my dad then introduced him to cinnabon delights. Today was a good day.
I swear every time I see him he's either dancing or trying to touch people
Ripping out my IUD in Dave and busters bathroom
You wrapped yourself in tin-foil and told us you were Iron Man. I have pictures.
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