You know, I didn't realize this at the time, but it appears that I am being "heavily petted" by 3 grown men in that pic.
If these were biblical times then you'd be a Roman Senator.
this is the fifth day in a row i've woken up after 3 pm, hungover. I might die when snowmageddon is finally over and we have to go back to class. my liver wont know how to take it.
At some point last night was I riding a garbage can.. Things are starting to come back to me
but i'm paying and its not a date cause he's got a gf and i'm hooking up with his roommate tomorrow night
I would have thought, as two of my best friends, you girls could have cought me as I fell out of the shower. There are so many bruises.
Who is this?
You offered to lift up your dress at the bar so I could see your lower back tattoo
Um, I think that was a general offer to everyone. So...who IS this?
I'm pretty sure I swallowed a whole condom
Sorry, I was unaware dragging you upstairs for sex was such an awful thing.
Soo I woke up in the storage room at best western....I dont even know what say
They just broke the window so they could get in and smoke the taxi driver out...
It's a beautiful day to be high as fuck
Maybe not Elvis quality pharmaceuticals...But some good stuff
On another note I never thought having a drug addicted stalker would prove useful
well...I was at work...until someone dropped dead during their performance of "I believe I can fly". It was karaoke night.
Idk, I know when I drink vodka my bi side comes out and I just want to make out with a girl
Randomize
