Going to Kmart high is like jumping in a time machine back to the 80s
Of course she's mad at you. You Kanye Wested a picture of her catching snowflakes in her mouth. "imma let you finish but..." was the shaft and you put two of Kanye West's heads for the balls.
I just read the lonely terrorist on nwa had 40 more friends than me on facebook
Avril Lavigne as a judge on Idol wearing devil ears. it's like every boner you ever had in 2002 just came true.
We smoked a joint and talked about his parent's divorce. It was like being fifteen all over again.
It's never too late to be topless.
Just did lines off your face, congrats on getting in the magazine bro
3pm strippers are depressing
The gay is strong with you! You're more concerned about my outfit than my safety.
What's the address and code again...does anyone need anything and why is my viking helmet on the bed?
So apparently I was a completely different person lastnight, one who drinks scotch and makes out with 55 year old men who look like inspector gadget
He just got really stoned and kept complementing my ponytail
the fact that you beer bonged rum made me so proud, the fact that you threw up an entire footlong tuna melt after... not so much babe
He made me ask permission to to cum and it made me cum.
Slept with a member of the band last night, found out today after extensive stalking he’s engaged. Pro tip: don’t research one night stands.
Randomize