Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
you left with a lisa lampanelli lookalike... i hope she was atleast funny
my cabbie only has one arm...this can't be safe
I briefly wondered why they weren't in school, but after the tinier one shouted "check out dem titties!" I had my answer
I just want you to sit on my face and to tell you you're pretty. Most girls would leap at this opportunity.
He was taking the condom off and he turns to me and says, "You know how snakes can shed their skin?"
This old guy just saw me toking on my bubbler before I go to the dentist. He gave me the nod.
Went to the doctor's today. The lady took one look at my throat and said "oh god"
Too much penis in there.
Guess who just got out of a ticket because the cop liked her costume? THIS GIRL.
Hey remember that time you called a woman a "man in a dress" and then threw up in a drinking fountain?
I feel like we need a drunken piñata bash with your face being the piñata and my hopes and dreams being the stick
My pants zipper is stuck halfway down. I have to interview an intern later. This day is gonna be amazing,
I need to see you idiots before I go back to school. But we shouldn't snort Crown Royal this time.
Like do I send him a nude to ease his mind off his brother having a stroke? I'm not very good with words when it comes to consoling... I would be a terrible mother.
You know shits really hit the fan when you start using public bathroom air freshener spray as perfume
what? where are you?
Randomize
