Idk if this white stuff in my shower is conditioner or... something else?
Is drinking merlot and watching womens figure skating by myself gay?
There are babies in the room i shouldnt be high with babies in the room.
I miss your penis. And I totally say this as a friend. I just miss it because it's great. You should be very proud of it.
All I learned from that experience was that drinking scotch out of a crunk goblet was bad news.
he just chased his shot of tequila with a chicken nugget.. either its a canadian thing or hes wasted
Just interrupted a freshman tour to ask where the sexual health center is. Figured I'd just give us all what we were really looking for.
My building was evacuated who wants to quake and bake
I have no idea where I am, where my pants are, there is cheese stuck to my ass.. Why do I have your phone?
shot for shot with some guy twice your age to prove Detroit hustles harder then you left with him. We're tracking you
She introduced me as that girl Nathan was fingering
Can't tell if its the LSD or if that demon man just stared at my penis. Cleveland is a weird place. All true stories.
Don't be surprised if I hand out mini dildos on Halloween
I just squirted in your honor. It's like pouring one out for the beautiful sex partnership that could have been
Self reach around competition is what the Olympics has been missing all along. A true test of athleticism.
I'm not sure you count what happened last night as sex.
Randomize
